“The reason I’m in this situation is because he was unfaithful to me!”
“If my wife was more supportive of what I wanted to do, we would still be together!”
“If they weren’t so biased on my job, I would be able to excel faster!”
“I can’t trust my son/daughter to make the right decisions so I have to watch their every move!”
As a society we have become so conditioned to blaming our own individual situations on everything outside of us… other people, the job, the government, society, America, Iraq, Afghanistan, etc… Yaddi, yaddi, yaddi…
And we wonder why we feel so powerless, that any and everyone can cause us harm. It’s why we live in a society that is so fear-filled about what others can do to us. We want to allow others to walk around with guns on their side in public, “Stand your Ground” law is acceptable, and it’s okay for police to brutalize people in custody, but not okay for parents to discipline their children by means of spanking at home.
We are all responsible and, to a large degree, participate in what happens in our society. Until we admit this, we will continue to live in a fear-filled existence, blaming any and everyone but ourselves for all the injustice, bad things and unfairness that happens in our lives.
On the job, we complain daily about what our bosses and co-workers are doing, how we hate our job and then when we are fired or lose the job, we complain about how unfairly we were treated.
In our relationships, everything is always wrong, nothing is right. We don’t enjoy being in the relationship, we complain about everything that is wrong, not being done, and that we wish would change. Then when the relationship ends, we complain about what the other person did or didn’t do in the relationship.
Remember what we think about, we bring about. When something is not going right in our lives, instead of looking for the reasons on the outside, we need to start searching within to examine how we are participating in the process.
We draw things into our lives by way of our thoughts and our expectations. Many people are involved in drama-filled relationships and situations because on a subconscious level, they attract drama in to their life by way of the energy that they put out in the form of thoughts and beliefs. Empowering interpretations and thoughts will bring joy and harmony into relationships, while disempowering and negative ones will bring discord and unhappiness.
In reality some people are addicted to emotional fixes of anger, sadness and fear, much like a drug addict is addicted to drugs. They feed off of drama and because of this they always draw drama into their experiences, relationships and realities. Even though they know that the energy and emotion does not feel good, and is detrimental to the relationship or situation, they still have the “urge” to follow through with the action and choose drama and discord over harmony and peace.
People who possess an emotional addiction to anger, tend to gravitate towards situations that allow for them to get angry and fly off the handle. Likewise, those who have a tendency towards feeling sad, self-pity and playing the role of “victim”, create situations that “make them sad”. Even though they will claim that it is the fault of the other person, they are the one drawing the experience to themselves based on the energy they are giving off.
When you allow others to be the blame for your situations, what you are essentially doing is giving your power away… you are admitting that that which is outside of you, has more power over your life, situations and circumstances than you do . It’s a dangerous and disempowering position to put yourself in.
What I would like to invite you to do, is take responsibility within your life, to do whatever you need to do to find happiness, security, fulfillment and joy for yourself. Give up your right to suffer and play the victim role. Remember that suffering is defined as having something you don’t want, or wanting something you don’t have, and always involves a lack of taking responsibility for doing what is needed to live life according to your own choices.
If you feel like a victim, I encourage you to make a choice to give 100% to yourself, that way you don’t have to look for what you need to come from an outside source, which could lend to disappointment.
If you have thrived on being a victim for a long period of time, with the intention to receive sympathy and pity from others, you may need to release your pitiful victim status. Accept full responsibility for taking the appropriate actions that will allow your life to work optimally, by doing whatever is necessary to live in choice, even if that means that you need to walk away from some things. Remember if you want something different, you have to be prepared to do things differently.
You may find that initially, creating a mindset that empowers you, may feel false or made up because there is no emotional charge attached… no anger, sadness or fear. When you catch yourself reacting negatively to something outside of you, remind yourself that you are not seeing the situation in a way that will support your joy, peace of mind and happiness. In that moment, choose a thought that empowers you. The result will be your happiness.
If you feel that you are not equipped to let go on your own, and need some help, contact me today by clicking here, and let’s get you on the road to owning and living according to YOUR power and not someone else’s.
BE Love, BE Power!
In Love and Light...
I am a lover of life and a lover of people. When we learn to connect in our heart space, love will be the driving force behind all we do. BE Love, BE Power!